Tuesday, July 31, 2012

Model Requirements

I was MIA. My butt was plastered in front of the TV watching the Olympics. In the meantime, I have decided that I am not an official blogger. Why? Let me explain. Coming up on a year blogging, I remember when I first thought about blogging I wanted to have a fashion blog. I wanted to show outfits on a budget for those out there who wanted to be fashionable and affordable. Then after researching it found that there were those type of blogs everywhere. So, I backed up and said I should do what I want. Blog for me and what I feel comfortable doing. I do still have aspirations to do some outfit posts, but I have learned that I am not officially a blogger until I master these few things. 

First, the watch..I can pull up 50 blogs and everyone one of these girls have this watch.

Michael Kors makes one hell of a watch but for $250 smacks I can find a cheap knock off and hopefully the camera won't focus in on the dial with the name on it.

Then there's the bubble necklace. Turquoise, yellow, coral. What color do you want?
I call this the skittles necklace. It looks like your tibbies exploded bursts of color from a red package of goodness.

I also need to learn to master the top knot or the blogger bun. I have no clue how many bobby pins it takes to hold in this Flaky baked goodness on top of your head but I also refer to it as the peeled onion look.


Mastering the mani isn't really on my list of things to do but its apparently important in a fashion blog to paint all your finger nails and go, "what the hell, lets paint one a different color, cool!" What I don't understand is why is it the ring finger? If I want to showcase something wouldn't it be more dramatic to give someone the middle finger? Just sayin.


And finally, I must have the blogger pose down. You know the ones with the handbag strategically placed, the one leg up while your looking at the ground, the walking pose where it looks like Simon says Freeze! All I hear is Madonna's song Vogue playing in my head.

So you see I am not officially a fashion blogger until all of things come into play but that's okay. I love my fashion peeps alot and I love being the funny girl. Somewhere I will meet in the middle, but until then I am just going to keep observing all of these things for maybe in my next life I will be a supermodel or maybe my ass will explode some earrings to go with my skittles necklace.

Strike a Pose,
Dusty


35 comments:

  1. haha, that's too funny! it's ok if your not a fashion blogger, I still love your blog! lol

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  2. Omg this is hilarious!! Super clever.
    Rachel
    www.lalalists.com

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  3. I'll never be official, whatev I like us how we are! You're fab!!

    Xx
    Tab

    Any package yet! I got mine yesterday! Love it

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  4. My top knot secret is a bun form. It gives your hair the fullness to pull it off. And I wore mine on Sunday night with only four bobby pins. I know, it was a miracle.

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  5. I love your blog, I don't find myself reading fashion blogs because I wear walmart jeans with oil stains and muddy work boots all day long. not a lot of time for fashion with this one. but we all know I can't get enough of what you have to say.

    And I so agree with the ring finger...what's that all about.

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  6. Your blog is perfect, lover! I get sick of fashion blogs. Yeah all their stuff is awesome and they look perfect, but I can't afford it so I don't care. I like funny, snarky Dusty blog!

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  7. And I am most officially NOT a fashion blogger. And never will be because of my ornery nature--when I see things that are all popular it makes me not like them anymore even if I did happen to like them before that. Which makes no sense at all. Maybe I shouldn't be so ornery...

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  8. Love this post..it's funny, not sure if it's supposed to be but is! I hate seeing the same thing everywhere...especially those high school friendship bracelets..ughhhh..but I do love a good top bun and statement necklace!
    sheree x
    www.itsnotthatdeep.com

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  9. I don't do outfit posts either, the thing is... who takes those pictures?? I am pretty sure no one is going to let me pose in different outfits each day so that I can post them on the internet.
    I love your funny blog!!

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  10. Great post! I love your blog and I'm your newest follower! hope you can check me out as well! : )

    http://allthingsprettyandlittle.blogspot.com/

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  11. you couldn't have nailed the fashion blog "musts" more perfectly!! hahahahhaaa. "Tibbies". Skittles exploding from tibbies. Right!!!?! LOL

    while I AM dying to see some fashion Dusty's way, I am certainly most happy that you blog your way, cause you do it so damn well!

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  12. Bahahaha! I think this is my favorite post yet! Please don't do any of these things. I'm so tired of going on peoples blog and thinking oh you bought that too? How original. Granted there are some things I like but spending so much on an accessory is ca-razy! I love your blog the way it is :)

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  13. you know what, I am just now noticing that everyone has that michael kors watch! proud to say I have the less expensive fossil version :-) booyah

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  14. I missed you yesterday!! I still have quite a few of these to accomplish...and here I thought I was a top notch fashion blogger!! Thanks for raining on my parade! ;) Damn!
    Shanna

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  15. hahah! what is funny is a refuse to get this big bubble necklace thing cause it looks like something that'll break in a day... i never have good luck with that stuff. as far as the watch, I actually have been wanting a michael kors watch but since seeing like every blogger has one, it does kind of get old. lol! I am no fashion blogger either though... and i suck at painting my nails. but if i did, i'd choose the middle finger.:)

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  16. i don't have the bubble necklace... or the watch... or the stance down... but i do have a big bun. its not as "in tact" as how it should be... but its definitely "there".

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  17. that watch? i think it's ugly. yep. i know i just lost popularity points. oh well.

    that necklace? i've seen it everywhere. you nailed it.

    the nails? i'm with you on that. i'd do my thumb for a sparkly "thumbs up" move.

    the poses? so awkard. i've done a few outfit posts...i hate them. it makes me feel retarded.

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  18. Bahahaha... I'm not a real blogger either, but I am guilty of owning a MK watch and several bubble necklace ordered from eBay. As for the top knot... hell, I can barely blow dry my hair in the morning and the posing? I have the same pose... and it looks like I have to pee.

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  19. You are so funny! I am guilty of falling for some of these blogger-"must do's" and "must haves"...but I refuse to pay that much for the Michael Kors watch so screw it. I'll keep wearing my $10 no-namer.

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  20. Stupid bubble necklace. I want one...in turquoise, mostly because I like to say the word turquoise. I come to see you everyday because you are you, and this blog is you, and you freaking ROCK. Just sayin...

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  21. If it makes you feel better, I don't own any of these things and I pretend to be a fashion blogger!

    1. I have a nice gold watch, but it's not Michael Kors.
    2. I don't own this blogger's necklace.
    3. I cannot figure out how to do a top knot.
    4. I don't have the patience to do a nice mani.
    5. I might be ok at posing, but only because when I first started my husband SHAMED me into practicing more. He said I looked stupid. Thanks hubby! :)

    xo, Yi-chia
    Always Maylee

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  22. oh the skittles necklace. I would want red. I only eat red skittles.
    You are so great. I love this post more than you know. I am so glad that your blog is exactly what your blog is ... you. I laugh every single day. I don't laugh every single day at nail polish and watches. Speaking of, I bought an MK watch and returned it within 24 hrs. I couldn't sleep.

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  23. haha I love this post, it's so true! I thought about being a fashion blogger for like 5 minutes and then realized I didn't own any of the items bloggers found fashionable. Then I decided to blog about whatever I felt like, and it's way more fun, right?

    Angie
    everafteralways.blogspot.com

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  24. This post cracked my ass up. Who needs fashion? I'd rather laugh at life and everyone living it. :) In a nice outfit if I have time, with my hair down, no jewelry to speak of and my nakey finger nails.

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  25. The only thing I have from this is the blogger bun. I guess I probably shouldn't start with the outfit posts!

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  26. Lady you are SO an official blogger! Although I would sell my car for a michael kors watch. My TV would make more sense. I can't watch the olympics anyways so it's pretty fucking worthless right now anyways!

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  27. This post is brilliant, it put such a smile in my face, you got it all spot on! I''m glad you aren't a proper fashion blog, I'm not a big fan of them, but your blog, I love it, it's one of the ones I make sure I read everyday.

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  28. This is hilarious! I have none of these things. I prefer to call myself a "lifestyle blogger" - my lifestyle.
    ♡ Lexi
    FASHION: Glitter & Pearls
    WEDDINGS: Glitter Weddings

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  29. You are so funny - I feel the same way about the watch and necklace. I get annoyed with the bloggers that are "big" and don't answer questions. All the bloggers that ACTUALLY have style I like aren't fashion bloggers and don't post details of the crap they're wearing. Boo.

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  30. bahahah how very true this is! I don't fit the stereotype either, you're not alone :)

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  31. I'm with Whitney, I love your blog, can't paint my nails, or afford the watch but I'm certain my hair is bun material ;+)

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  32. LOL!! so.true.
    love your sense of humor and honesty!

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  33. I hate the skittles necklace. It looks ridiculous. And your blog is infinitely better than just a straight fashion blog. Who needs fancy watches, beehive-of-our-time hair, and a tittie-exploding necklace? Not me.

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  34. Lol, this stuff is definitely true - can't lie! You're too funny. ;-) Greetings from Atlanta. And PS - I love friend pickles! ;-)

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  35. Just stumbled across your blog from Simply Stacia and LOVE IT! My baby girl and I were painting our finger nails this morning, and you know - I too was thinking, why do they paint the ring finger a different colour??? So I hit Google to get the answer....turns out nobody knows why! Someone did it and then everyone else copied it....lol

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