Wednesday, November 30, 2011

Ditch the LBD

It's almost that time for the endless Christmas parties. I think I have four total this year. Every year, we all search for the perfect outfit (that we wear over and over) because lets face it unless you see these people at the same function, they have no clue you're recycling your outfit. And until I become some high society piece, this girl will be wearing the same thing just respraying the perfume to refresh it. All the mag's right now are featuring the "LBD" (little black dress for my fav redneck friends). But I am not a fan of dresses. I think my legs look like two turkey legs fighting to make a wish. If you see me in a dress, it means one of two things - I have had a moment of pretty or all my jeans are dirty. Don't get me wrong. I have dresses and I see them on others and want them so bad. Maybe one of my resolutions for 2012 will be to wear more dresses. So this year, I say ditch the little black dress and wear something unexpected; a conversation piece. You know something the administrative assistant will say, "did you see what Dusty was wearing at the Christmas party, the nerve!" Which means she secretly liked it but didn't have the kahunas to wear it or it could mean she secretly wants to be a hooker for her night job. 

Any hoot, this is what I am thinking my rebels:

Start with the innocent: Pearls

then throw on these: Velvet flare pants

something that shows your personality
Barbie T

slip on

the unexpected
This faboo fur jacket!

I think I might just give my left pinkie toe for that jacket. I would walk in, go straight for the wine bar and grab the IT guy and convenience him to do the Electric Slide in this outfit. So girls, ditch the LBD, do something unexpected and have fun for 'Tis the Season To Be Jolly. Do you have your outfit picket out yet?

PS.. don't forget to follow me on this blog via your email and Google Connect, Twitter, Bloglovin, Pinterest and Facebook!

Happy Holidays,

Tuesday, November 29, 2011

The Hype Is Over..

Black Friday and Cyber's over for 2011! Did you enter the madness? Not me. I did it once about 7 years ago and I said never again. I like staying out of jail. There are plus and minus's to both days. I get it. There's something funny about women who get together, strategies a route in a store, obtain walkie talkie's for constant communication, convince a clueless friend who has no idea what danger zone they are entering, to stand in line to save a spot for checkout all the while you are pushing a cart full of early a.m. deals around a store like you're on the Amazing Race. I live fairly close to a shopping center filled with Target, Old Navy, JCP and other price worthy stores. I don't like being trapped. The traffic just to go the bank on Friday was looney. It was insanity at it's best. I am not going to stand outside in 40 degree weather at 3 am to freeze my baguettes off over a five dollar toy that's going to end up at the bottom of the toy box 45 minutes after opening it because the box would make a good clubhouse after cutting out some windows and a door. This princess likes her beauty sleep. 

However, I did manage to get on-line about 8:45 that morning to see what deals were going on. I found most of the deals on-line where gone. I tried every way in the world to buy my son some jeans from Old Navy for ten bucks. Fail! Item out of stock. Why advertise it, someone should be setting behind a computer when items sell out; to take it off the website. But all wasn't a bust. I did manage to purchase three things. This after having to refresh the page and almost an hour of trying to check out because the site kept crashing, yet somehow kept all the items in my "cart" every time i would log back on. Basically, two hours of my time, I could have used to probably fight the traffic to get a pizza from the Pizza Hut in Target. But its over, gone, forgotten and women folk everywhere are feeling like super hero's because they bought the last Ralph Lauren sweater on the rack for a fraction of the price while keeping all of their teeth and bail money fund in the jar for next year! Till the next Black Friday and Cyber Monday..fairwell!

Happy Holidays,

Sunday, November 27, 2011

the story of our tree

Tradition in our house has always been to put the tree up after Thanksgiving which I am sure is 90 percent of America's tradition as well. I have always loved Christmas. It's my favorite holiday ever. In the past, I have had theme trees. You know, those beautiful trees that are either silver and gold, red and green etc.. Well, when my son came along he would make all these handmade ornaments and of course you're a suck ass mom if you don't put them on the tree, but it sure didn't go with my "theme". So, I thought about it and looked at ornaments and found that I love little snowmen, gingerbread people, lollipops, stars, snowflakes and all of those things that are too cute and represent Christmas in a child's eyes. We also have ornaments that represent times in our lives, like when we got engaged, married, pregnant and special places like Maine, where my lovey is from (nothing like having a lobster hanging on your tree). Then I know it sounds corny, but I thought about how long ago others decorated their trees with fruit and popcorn. So I combined it all and it became a "hodgepodge tree". 

Every year I always buy at least 5 new ornaments (as if I need them and thank you mom). I couldn't wait to hang them on the tree. So Saturday after coffee, of course, we I started off the decorating. Lovey retrieved the goods from the attic and half a day later the house is decorated and festive. I have a few more things I want to include, but that will come throughout the week. Until then, here are a few pictures of our tree and my little helper, worthless guard dog #1, Mille. 

new ornament

dad, mom, ian's stockings
(I need to add the worthless guard dog's #1 and #2)

Mille (aka Alfalfa)
our pretty fatso and snowball

Ralphie, Hazel & Phin
(We got these the year before Ian was born, I love these so much)

So that's a snippet of our holiday decor. I hope everyone had fun putting up their tree and you make beautiful memories and traditions throughout the season. What is the story of your tree? I would love to hear. 
Merry Christmas,

Thursday, November 24, 2011

Give Thanks

Here's wishing everyone a great Thanksgiving. I hope your spending it in cozy places with beautiful faces making memories and laughter to last a lifetime. Give Thanks!


Wednesday, November 23, 2011

A different kind of thankful

When I received this, I got a big lump in my throat and tears welled up in my eyes. I cannot tell you what or how large of an animal lover I am. At one time we had 5 labs, a cat, and 3 fish. Now we are down to 2 yellow labs since the passing of our sweet chocolate lab earlier in the fall. Ugh! I can't tell you how devastating it was, but when I see this. It makes me realize that not only are humans thankful for our friends, I am sure in a dog's world they are thankful for us, but their fellow friend as well.

Lily is a Great Dane that has been blind since a bizarre medical condition required that she have both eyes removed. For the last 5 years, Maddison, another Great Dane, has been her sight. The two are, of course, inseparable.

"People will forget what you said; People will forget what you did. 
But people will never forget how you made them feel."

How sweet is this? It shows us that our instincts are to help and care for each other and be grateful for what we have and who we are for those less fortunate may not have what you do. You know what I really love about this most of all? How happy the look on that dog's face is. He can't see but he's so happy to have a friend.

Be thankful for your friends for they walk in when the rest of the world sometimes walks out. 

Tuesday, November 22, 2011


Hello friends, today you can find me over here at whiskey.tango.foxtrot Oh, my goodness don't you just love the name? Faboo!

Be sure you check me out and in the mean time, check out this little sweetie. She's adorable, read some of her posts and give her some love. She's a beautiful military wife holding down the fort with her chin up!
Tell me about yourself!
Im Kristen. An army wife who is brand new to Army life! We packed our bags and while hes in training Im back home with my mom. I was in Paul Mitchell for hair (if you need any tips) and a merchandiser for Forever21. I am lucky enough to have been able to stay at home until we get settled in at our first station next summer! It has its ups and downs and I am just counting down the days until I can be with my husband again. Im a huge Harry Potter and Star Wars nerd and I love working out and being healthy!
Why did you start blogging and what do you get from it?
I started blogging to keep myself not only busy but creative while the hubby is gone. I have totally fallen in love with and needless to say I am addicted! I love the feeling of having people comment and listen to my story.
Who is your role model and why?
My mom is my role model because she is strong and the most hardworking person I have ever met. But on a lighter note, Tina Fey is my number 2. She is not only the funniest woman ever but she has gone through so much to get to where she is now!
What is on your Christmas wishlist this year?
My hubby! (and a Canon Rebel) He gets to come home for 2 weeks during Christmas and I have never been more excited for something in my entire life! I have always always always wanted a Canon Rebel and hubby wrote me in a letter that he wants to get me one for Christmas :) Am I spoiled or what?! Best husband ever.

Follow her here:

See isn't she a cutie! Go to her blog, show her some love, grab a button and tell two friends. Again, another thankful follower and bloggy friend in this week of giving thanks! Happy Thanksgiving, my new friend. Thank you for featuring me and I hope you make some new friends.

Monday, November 21, 2011

I heart Photobucket

With the lovey off hunting wabbits..just kidding.. deer (yuck, makes me sad and I don't eat it EVER), my weekend was sort of eventful, it as usual wasn't long enough but on the bright side three day work week sounds pretty nice right about now. My weekend consisted of a weekend expo with my friend Wendy at this great place called the Art Mill just a few miles away. The sponsor of the expo was the Wilson Living Magazine (make note of that, you will hear alot about them in 2012 from me.) I don't want to sound like a crab, but I was disappointed. Back a few months ago, we went to a Fall Festival at a local bank and had a blast, this one did not live up to my expectations, but I will go back next year because I have a hidden agenda. It was ALOT of jewelry vendors, a few clothing vendors and a few craft vendors to boot. Oh, and Santa, who actually moved like he was 1 bazillion years old, which also confused my son who asked me this morning where the reindeer were? I politely said behind the building. To sum it up, we were there for a total of 40 minutes and left for the local shoe store.

The rest of Saturday was pizza, lots of sweet tea and pictures. Ian decided to take some pictures of me (he loves a camera). I uploaded these photos and went to town on Photo bucket. I heart Photo bucket!!!! I especially love the retro and cross process effects and I discovered that you can BEAUTIFY yourself. That's right..its a "wrinkle be gone" effect that has won my heart over. After smoothing out a few lines and erasing one lingering zit, here is the finished process. Please be aware that I am not a professional. This is clearly a funtastic hobby and I hope once I get my new camera (hint hint Santa Chad), I hope to be a picture taking beast.

retro process
retro/cross process
Old Time Photo w/text

I spent hours having fun with this, I am SOOOOOO NOT photogenic but if you notice to the right, I have a new button. Tell me what you think. 

And as the photo states, this week is of giving thanks. Thank you to all my followers and the wonderful blogger friends I have made. Don't forget you can follow me on Twitter now. I think I have sort of gotten the hang of it. I love this blog community and am so grateful.


Thursday, November 17, 2011

Two Cents Thursdays

My Thursday started off just delicious this morning. After ousting my southern roots and turning into my secret life as a Yankee (remember I am fictitiously from Hoboken), I became the girl who honked her horn for 3 seconds, used a famous finger to explain in sign language that the man in a monster beast truck was number one and topped it off with a reference to his mother, someone I don’t know. Thank gawd because I would call her up and tell her, her son about ran me off the road this morning.  A great start to my almost weekend. Please hurry up by the way.

Here is my Two Cents Thursdays that I am now sharing with you.

-I do not understand our interstate system. We have engineers that design roadways all day long, cities such as Nashville with 6 lanes. Still I manage to waste 40 minutes more of my life every day setting in this crap. I think I will write the Department of Safety with an itemized bill of how much time I am wasting setting in miles of traffic every single day due to the lack of planning on their part. Whoever thought that merging two interstates together in rush hour traffic everyday obviously need to be hit in the head with a wet squirrel.  If there was a button in my car that let me push, speed up and do a Dukes of Hazzard fly by off the exit ramp into my parking lot, I would certainly install it today.

-Kotex issues recall on tampons. Wouldn’t you hate to be the shmuck that has to hold the press conference for that. “Yes, my name is Bloody Mary and we are issuing this recall because we are having a problem with the string spring action attached to a piece of tubular cloth.” How many rednecks do you think will actually take these back to the store for a refund?

-Kat Von D issued a statement saying Jesse James cheated on her with 19 women. A major “wow” moment.  Can’t argue with stupid and you can’t fix crazy. One of these days when he gets a STD Ajax can’t get rid of, maybe these women will back away from the love machine.

-I love that my mom still gets her hair “frosted”. She is so 1980..hug her!

-I just started sewing lessons. High five!

-I secretly think it would be fun to learn all the moves from “Thriller”. (I am not a Michael Jackson fan, but I really want to do this with a group of people..Volunteers anyone?”

And finally, most that know me, know that I have this “thing” about skinny jeans on men. Please men species everywhere, refuse to wear them. Women long ago were issued the phrase “camel toe” if our jeans were too tight in the front. There is something less to be desired about seeing a man in tight skinny jeans with bullfighting going on in the front. Some animals do not co-habitate well together. They like to be free and mingle. If you put a bull and a matador together someone will lose. Every time I see this I want to burn my cornea’s out with a Cuban cigar. YUCK!

Happy Thursday, beautifuls!


Wednesday, November 16, 2011

Negligent Slobicide

Life Report states:
The Victim: Mom, 40 …aka Dusty, baby, honey, maid, lover, wifey, brown hair, 5’4”, 120 pounds, has full time job from 7:30 to 4:30.
Scene of the Crime:  brown house in Tennessee
Date: Sunday, Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, 2011

As reported by Mom aka Dusty (see above). Upon entering the house Monday night the victim notices black shirt, socks on floor, house shoes scattered, two separate coffee cups half full with un-drank coffee (no need to swab for DNA), butter tub and jelly jar on counter, 4 english muffins missing from bag of six (should file a separate report on that), unmade bed, furry dog hair from lazy guard dog, a Lab known as Mille, fork on nightstand, Mt. dew cans; one located on coffee table, the other on stove, no toilet paper replaced on empty toilet paper stand, people magazine in middle of bathroom floor, and hunting equipment setting on dining table.

Further into the night, after cleaning up the events above with a pretty good idea of who the unsub #1 could be. She notices spilled chicken noodle soup, five gummy wrappers scattered throughout the house, three juice pouches; one placed on the cabinet, one tipped over leaking on the table and the other flat as a pancake lying in the bedroom floor. As she moves through the house she finds, two socks, one pair of jeans thrown on the floor in the spare bedroom, tighty whitey underwear drug into the bathroom probably by worthless guard dog number 2, Lab named Libby, popsicle wrapper on floor by trash can, and toys scattered throughout.

After an endless night of cleaning, tired and ready for bed, she washes her face, applies wrinkle cream, sets to use the potty and yes, that’s right -  pee on the toilet seat. Unsub #2 obviously has left a nice wet calling card for the victim, in which to disgrace and deface.


Unsub #1 – Male, 39 known as Dad aka…Chad, honey, baby daddy, provider, pool boy, handyman, jackass
Unsub #2 – Male, 6 known as Son aka…Ian, pooka bear, poo poo head, Damn it Ian

Crime as charged: Negligent Slobicide.

Mom states she works her baggetts off, comes home, cooks, cleans, tends to dogs, does laundry and is worn out. She states she lives with slobs! Two of the male species known as slobs. Let me repeat, SLOBS! The charges, if found guilty (which I am pretty sure this is a slam dunk case); perpetrators will be sentenced to no breakfast on Saturdays, full day of shopping with mom as punishment, and STRIKE.

Shut the front door you say? That’s right Strike! Keep it up and you’re going to have no cookies cooked for school functions, no dishes washed, no clean underwear, and no toilet paper to wipe your asses.

I, Dusty, do solemnly swear that all of the facts stated in the above fake affidavit are true.

Dad: Negligent Slob

Son: Negligent Slob

Tuesday, November 15, 2011

What if?

Yesterday, I was setting in our bi-weekly marketing meeting and after explaining the ins and outs of the marketing report to seven other individuals (men species) who didn't give a crap about what I had to say. I started to daydream. Yes, its a trade off really. The men species do not care what I do as long as they don't have to do it and I don't give a rats patooty what they do as long as they give me their monthly marketing results. We work well together..really truly. So, as the Charlie Brown teacher voice started to override what was being said, I thought to myself..hmmm, all this corporate protocol is over rated. The business suits, ties, the button up oxfords, A-line pencil skirts, pearls and for what? These people only care about the free lunch I ordered and when can I go back to my desk to eat my chocolate chip cookie that was in my lunch box, so everyone doesn't think I am a pot bellied pig after eating a double decker club sandwhich.

So in my daydream I went to the land of Hoboken. I am obsessed with Hoboken. I have never been there, only know it's in New Jersey, but I love to say it. Everyone say it with me.. HO-BO-KEN! See isn't it fun? I remember as a kid one of my family members used to say when you asked where something was, "I don't know where its at, somewhere in Hobokenland." I thought it was ficticious until I learned its a real place. Kind of like B.F.E. but we know that's really far away. Anyhoot, I was thinking, I wonder what they would do if I showed up in this to give a major power point presentation, talking about strategic planning, our marketing areas and client type and how we are going to retain their services....

Let's start with this jacket


with this FANTAB t shirt

Put on these happening jeans

slip on
Free People wedges
which are on sale by the way

add this bag

with my hair
in this rocking pony tail with the bangs
I am contemplating
Walk in and say, "Good morning, gentlemen, My name is Dusty, that's Mrs. Alley to you (insert Janet Jackson music here)!" I think, they would take me seriously, after all I am secretly from Hoboken.

Monday, November 14, 2011

DIY - Boho Jewelry Board

I have been in dire need of a new jewelry box or a bigger one. My son had this old chalk board that once was in my kitchen. So, I guess you could say it's been recyled now for the third (and final time). I have been wanting to do something with it, so I decided to make a jewelry board out of it. Thanks to my sweet mom for giving me a gift certificate to the local craft store for my birthday because I knew just what I wanted to do. I think it turned out fantabulous.

The Stuffs

Painted brown

Hot glued fabric to cork squares
(my board isn't perfectly square. I (my lovey) had to cut pieces to fit)

I liked this fabric, it felt vintage to me

And wait for it....


It would have took me about 3 hours, but I was doing about four other things at the time. I start something, then go to another, etc. I think they have a name for that condition, but I hate to self diagnose. I glued the buttons to push pins, snipped the ends and then put a little glue around the inside of the pin to glue to fabric to hold. I still have my jewelry box, just more room to collect more.. Shopping anyone?

Happy Monday!


Sunday, November 13, 2011

Lounge Day

I officially declare this Sunday "lounge day!" I refuse to get out of my fleecy pants, fuzzy socks and comb my hair. Sunday's usually consists of cleaning house, grocery and laundry. I did my cleaning and grocery shopping yesterday and I am finishing up the laundry. I am so over it that I took the last two batches separated out and threw them in together. Who cares, right? High five my self for conserving energy and water is the way I see it.

I have worked on my blog this weekend. I took all of my posts labels and put them into categories (click). All the label listings were driving me crazy. I am not a type "A" personality by no means, but I don't like clutter which my life is full of because I live with two boys. I also fixed my links to face book, I apparently had that screwed up.

Also, I joined the world of Twitter. It literally made me sick at my stomach. No, seriously, I pooped like three times. I was scared to death of it. I am still somewhat private. I felt like if I joined it: the government was going to find out everything about me, scan my pupil and turn me into the bionic women (once they found out how faboo I, just kidding). No, I am not a techno freak. I sat here yesterday cussing my blog trying to get rid of the pencil/wrench tool. Anyway, I did it. Follow me if you think I am twit worthy.

I finished my DIY jewelry board, post on that this week. Read the new Lucky magazine. I don't know if it's just me, but the last few magazines I have bought haven't been to whup whup to me. I did Pinterest briefly this morning. Had my coffee, now eating a hot dog with Frito chili cheese chips.. Oh, did I mention its fat day too? Uh, hum.. sho is. Tonight, I will be whipping up a batch of baked spaghetti. I have my own fantab recipe for this but decided to try one from Pinterest with a few minor adjustments. And with it...BREAD! (refer two sentences above regarding fat day).

Happy Lounge Day everyone!


Friday, November 11, 2011

A Story of Sacrifice..Happy Veterans Day

This is dedicated to my Pee Paw. A short little Norwegian man, where I am sure I got my sense of humor, who always used to say, "whenever you're in Texas look me up (we lived in Tennessee)" or grunted when you said "I love you" knowing that was his way of saying it back. I also want to say to my family, this is story for our memories to tell our children and for my uncle, my brother, my dad and step dad who served our country, I love you and thank you so much.

On May 19, 1944 was a day that changed my great grandparents lives, I am sure, forever. As the story has been told and some parts we are still researching, the plane was on a mission in Berlin. My great uncle, Willard Christensen was a Sargent in the Army Air Corps along with his brother Tony who were stationed in England. My uncle was a tail gunner on the B-17 bomber plane, the Donna Mae II and had not flown many missions on that plane. That day as fog set in, the plane above dropped a fateful bomb that hit my great uncle's plane bending the tail wing completely straight down. The plane did not make it back safely and all perished. To this day, we only know that he is buried in a mass grave because the plane of course burned upon crashing.

My great Uncle Willard was not suppose to fly on that mission that day. My great Uncle Tony's wife was pregnant at the time and my great Uncle Willard took his place so my great Uncle Tony could go be with his wife. The love of two brothers was such that one gave his life, so the other could help bring a new life into the world.

This is an actual photo. On the left is the actual bomb that hit the tail wing. The arrow points to wear my great Uncle Willard was located. Those two stack that look like posts were gun racks he operated. This was published in Life magazine back during the war and incorrectly reported the plane made it back safely, but that was not the case.

This is an actual letter that my family has received through others written by the pilot above that dropped that fateful bomb.

How grateful we are for those people that served our country and continue to serve our country. My grandfather MJ who was a Marine Corp medic, great Uncle Ole (US Army),  great Uncle Tony (US Army) and great Uncle Willard Christensen (US Army) all served in WWII.

Willard before he went overseas gave my grandfather his watch and said "you keep this, I'll get it when I get back." He never returned.

Your first born granddaughter loves and misses you Pee Paw. Thank you to you and all of our family for the sacrifice.


Thursday, November 10, 2011

I heart Ruthie Hart!

Do you remember when Bugs Bunny blasted off to Mars and encountered the marshen and the big creature? The big creature picks up Bugs Bunny and says, "oh, I want to love him and squeeze him and call him George." That's how I feel about this sweet girl. I followed The Chronicles of Ruthie Hart on Bloglovin. She had a post about offering a button swap. I emailed her saying I would love to participate but my button wasn't functioning thinking that she would keep me in mind for future button swaps. She emailed me right back, offered to make me a new button and wa-la! That beautiful button you see on the side, is compliments of Ruthie. How kind is she? That a stranger reached out her kindness to a little ol' new blogger with just a few followers made me feel like I found a shining star. She's funny, beautiful, a wife and a mommy to the cutest dog with the funniest faces. Show her some love, visit her blog, leave her sweet thoughts and visit her site often. She rocks! I know you will love her just as much as I love being her bloggy friend. I heart Ruthie Hart!

Howdy! My name is Ruthie and I am southern newlywed wife, mama to a cute chunky French bulldog and love of all things crafty. My blog chronicles my life, everything from my relationship with Jesus, the ridiculous costume parties my husband plans and trying to become Suzie Homemaker while balancing a full time job in software marketing. In my house, we love, we hug, we live out loud, we make mistakes and make fools of ourselves. Oh, and I blog all about it!

Happy Thursday!

Wednesday, November 9, 2011

Two Cents Thursdays on Wednesday

What a great day it is for two reasons...1. I met my bloggy CHWH swap partner this morning (love love) and 2. its frozen pizza night at the Alley household! That's right, I went all out, a Tombstone cheese pizza hot and fresh right out of the oven. I feel so Italian, where are my cannoli's (which I love by the way)! My butt which looks like two piglets in the farm yard wrestling over a piece of cornbread says, "thank you, mama mia!"

Any hoot, you see my title post. I usually do my rants on Thursday's but tomorrow I will be featuring another sweet gem that I heart! So stay tuned until tomorrow. In the mean time, here are my Two Cents Thursdays. If you haven't read any of the others, check it out here.

Lets start with EBay... I have been searching EBay for a pair of clogs. I found a pair on a Spanish website but apparently to ship them Christopher Columbus is bringing them over on his ship. So, I search EBay endlessly. I see so many pairs, but then I realize that they are just as expensive as if you found them in the store. Seriously, years ago when this site started, it was a way to find long lost items at a discounted price. Now its become a shopping mecca like clicking on Shop bop. I am not talking Prada here people. A little ol' pair of clogs to go with my flared jeans and shorts in the summer. I mean if you want a deal on Lucky Brand jeans or 7 for all Mankind, maybe its a deal. I will just have to wait until I poop that money tree and it grows before I can afford that, but really I am so disappointed..Ebay Sucks!...(now).

Are we all not so sick of hearing about Kim Kardashian. I admit, I have this fascination with reality TV. My favorite show is the The Real Housewives of New Jersey, and I so got sucked into the Fairy Tale wedding re-runs and now its over. Divorce in the works, scandal in Hollywood, money down the drain and two nights of my life of watching I can't get back. Ugh! I mean she was so in love. The only thing I see wrong with this whole thing is she needed a step ladder to have sex with the guy (uber tall). I mean, rich, big diamond ring, publicity..hmmm, 72 days.. this girl needs a reality kick in the ass if you ask me.

And finally, The Duggars are pregnant with their 20th child..holy moly. That dude needs to back away from the muffin. Seriously, her vajay jay is saying, no no not again. Who has an elastic uterus? Not me, I have one and no desire to have anymore. Do these people not think of college, weddings, school activities, food. They need a grey hound bus to travel. Imagine taking them all trick or treating. You'd have no candy left. Here's my advice... the women needs to get spade like a dog and quick as possible!

Happy Two Cents Thursdays on Wednesday everyone! 

Here she is Mrs. America!

The anticipation was overwhelming. I checked everyday to see if "it" had arrived. The disappointment when there was no email, no word. Had they forgotten me, was I worthy? I am a new blogger, maybe I should send a video with me pleading to let me participate. Day and night, I wondered as the thoughts rolled through my head like a honey drizzled croissant and a cup of coffee in the morning. And finally, this morning at 8 am, there she was. It was like the clouds parted ways, celestial rays of sunlight shone down upon my gmail account.. My Cold Hearts Warm Hands blog swap partner! Here she is Miss (oh wait, Mrs.) America, Justine from Stop Me If You've Heard This One.

(How many of you have seen that dress, see above, on Pinterest? And how many times have I thought that's perfect for New know you have!) Any hoot, we have already exchanged a few emails, I have spent an hour reading her posts and belly laughed out loud, she is beautiful, just wait until you see her picture, we are very, very similar and I heart her so much I want to feed her some fried chicken. Listen, if Rachel Zoe can make references to food so can I. So, my little blog lovelies, show her some love. Click her site, read it, love it, talk about it, make a shampoo commercial out of it and tell two friends and so on, and leave her some beautimus comments! She is after all Mrs. America!


Tuesday, November 8, 2011

Happy vs. Disturbing

Things making me HAPPY!

-the "retro effect" on Photo bucket
-my 12 year old yellow lab Mille and her "shwings" (ball)
-my son and his silly glasses
-new blog followers
-chili dogs and sweet tea
-Miss Piggy as featured story in In Style magazine
-hot chocolate

Things I find Disturbing!
-python print shoes (I don't dig snake prints, they freak me out)
-the Michael Jackson trial
-"A" symmetrical hair cuts
-the 17 year old girl who married the 50 something guy..yuckola
-those pointy fingernails that Fergie wears

Well, that's my Tuesday rambling. Do you have a happy vs. disturbing list?

Monday, November 7, 2011

The Big Bang Theory

I have love hate relationship with my hair. I am such a hair person, I grow it out, then cut it off (not too short). I would love to have a cutesy tootsey hair do, but I will just have to dream about it, because I cut my hair off short and I feel like I have a pumpkin head. I have grown my bangs out for the last few months and kept them like that, but as the appearance of wrinkles (or my imagination of them) creep into my head, I think about cutting them into side swept bangs again. I always grow them out, cut them, then freak out because I think they are to short and feel like a little Amish girl named Mary Beth Elizabeth Rebecka Katie Jebidiah Jones. I think oh, they will grow back out and then I see all these beachy waves in the magazines and then I get all Cali girl (I have never even been to California). Any hoot, I found some pictures on-line for inspiration.

Well, tell me what you think? To bang or not to bang, that is the question! Happy Monday!