Tuesday, July 31, 2012

Model Requirements

I was MIA. My butt was plastered in front of the TV watching the Olympics. In the meantime, I have decided that I am not an official blogger. Why? Let me explain. Coming up on a year blogging, I remember when I first thought about blogging I wanted to have a fashion blog. I wanted to show outfits on a budget for those out there who wanted to be fashionable and affordable. Then after researching it found that there were those type of blogs everywhere. So, I backed up and said I should do what I want. Blog for me and what I feel comfortable doing. I do still have aspirations to do some outfit posts, but I have learned that I am not officially a blogger until I master these few things. 

First, the watch..I can pull up 50 blogs and everyone one of these girls have this watch.

Michael Kors makes one hell of a watch but for $250 smacks I can find a cheap knock off and hopefully the camera won't focus in on the dial with the name on it.

Then there's the bubble necklace. Turquoise, yellow, coral. What color do you want?
I call this the skittles necklace. It looks like your tibbies exploded bursts of color from a red package of goodness.

I also need to learn to master the top knot or the blogger bun. I have no clue how many bobby pins it takes to hold in this Flaky baked goodness on top of your head but I also refer to it as the peeled onion look.

Mastering the mani isn't really on my list of things to do but its apparently important in a fashion blog to paint all your finger nails and go, "what the hell, lets paint one a different color, cool!" What I don't understand is why is it the ring finger? If I want to showcase something wouldn't it be more dramatic to give someone the middle finger? Just sayin.

And finally, I must have the blogger pose down. You know the ones with the handbag strategically placed, the one leg up while your looking at the ground, the walking pose where it looks like Simon says Freeze! All I hear is Madonna's song Vogue playing in my head.

So you see I am not officially a fashion blogger until all of things come into play but that's okay. I love my fashion peeps alot and I love being the funny girl. Somewhere I will meet in the middle, but until then I am just going to keep observing all of these things for maybe in my next life I will be a supermodel or maybe my ass will explode some earrings to go with my skittles necklace.

Strike a Pose,

Friday, July 27, 2012

I took a dump

Life is a wild ride

We put on many hats to get threw it

Or a set of wings to fly

But with family by your side, you can conquer your fears

Here's the 411... We went on a vacay to the Smokey Mountains Dollywood theme park. The kid is setting in a replica seat of the new ride the Screaming Eagle (watching it made me sick). Duh in this hillbilly hat he found at a leather store (no he didn't buy it), a photo I took the morning we left (hair tutorial high five) and the photo of my family on the Thunderhead roller coaster. The kid said he never wanted to ride it again! His face is priceless. Moral of this story..Family is everything. 

Have a great weekend,

Thursday, July 26, 2012

Hot Tamale ..July Sponsors

I have had the best sponsors this month. So this wild ride continues, I want to share them with you.

MaKaila, Distinctly M, is one of my greatest blogging besties. She has a unique style, a sharp eye for photography and is a 100 percent snoop. Her blog is so versatile. It’s packed with beautiful pictures from her adventures of living in Oregon and her fashion posts on Wednesday are so trendy. I kind of wished she did more (just my secret). She truly is the sweetest and I am so glad we are now great friends. She says I make her spit her coffee. My goal is to get it to come out her nose.

Shannon, Bungalow 960, is the only woman I know that can wear the blogger bun in perfect style. This sweet girl is from Nebraska and I am pretty sure should be a food and beer critic. I love her little adventures around town and stories of her fur babies. She’s also a tweeting beast with all the latest and greatest music and news for the day. She may even have Perez Hilton on speed dial (kidding). I love the Bung and she's got a new blog for bookworms everywhere. Go check her out pronto.

Justyn, Thoughts by a Petite Brunette, or sissy as I refer to her is a hoot. She’s kind of like me. I will say about anything but she will do it in a dress. She and I have become so close and we share a birthday which is why I call her my sissy although I was already pretty old when she was born, like 16 to be exact. She has great fashion style, am pretty sure she could make you a drink with her eyes closed and her humor is a little quirky which is totally what makes her rock. Go see my sissy.

Samara, The Secret Life of Samara,is apple pie. I remember having a conversation one day about her cute little rabbit and she promptly emailed me back and said I could have the rabbit because it crapped on the floor. From then on I knew would be friends. I love her because she blogs about real life stuff. I mean we all do, but she had a post recently about her friend in school that had cancer. I proceeded to not only cry my eyes out but blow snot bubbles. This girl even though petite has a heart big as the world. Go over and see her. I mean who doesn't love a girl and a bunny?

Michelle, Mish Lovin Life, is a spit fire and a ball of energy. Not only is she gorgeous, but she is funny as crap. She's defiantly not afraid to speak her mind. She's a ton of fun and recently celebrated her birthday in which she unbanned her ban on alcohol, but now I think its banned again. Just go over and read her About section on her blog. If that doesn't get you sucked in then your a dummy. Go see the California half Korean half White Woman.

Stacia, Simply Stacia, is somewhat new to the blogging world. I love when new bloggers come over because although I am not the biggest blog, they ask me for advice and sponsor and I love making new friends. She has two beautiful boys and is going through life one day at a time with courage and bravery. She is pretty crafty too. Making over old furniture and these fantab necklaces that you can view on her blog. I am very proud to have her on this journey. 

So there you have this wonderful group of honey's. I encourage you to go visit because the are the cream of the crop. I have been so lucky with my sponsors and swappers. Next month is no different. If you would like to be apart of this roller coaster of crazy, click my sponsor page. Let's do this thang!


Wednesday, July 25, 2012

Quirky Style

I love Wednesdays its my time to be a chick! I am feeling a little quirky this week. I don't know if its getting back into the groove or anticipation of things to come in August. So many great things to come in my blog. If you would like to sponsor and grow just go to my sponsor page, its a mere $5 smacks and all those ladies in the sidebar are the bomb. 

Okay enough of that shizl. Because I am feeling quirky, I have definatly taken a liking to that mint color. And although I hate peppermint patties with a passion, this color is awesome. And you can do so much with it. It could be the new black. If it makes my fluffy look smaller, its my everything, let me sing a song about it. 

So I came across this little doozy on the Pinterest and thought... this is my speed.

And because I am all about being a little funky today, I think I will add these.

Source: ae.com via Girls Love on Pinterest

Add this and call it a day!

Now I saw the price of this bag, so in my world a nice little old lady with a sewing machine, some canvas and a stencil will do the trick. 

I think my friends this is casual cool. Like it? Who care's I do and this concludes another fabulous Tater Queens Fashion Inspiration post.

Be Quirky today wont'cha!

Tuesday, July 24, 2012

Olympic Schmpics

"The new phone books are here!" Does anyone remember what movie that line was from? Oh and without totally looking it up. I watched it a 1000 times. My brother used to watch the movie Hot Dog. I think it was the start of his puberty years. Anyway, this Friday the Olympics are back and I can't wait. You have heard me talk about how my son's first name came from an Olympic gold medalist. I love, love the Olympics! I could have won a medal in several events, let me explain.

The pole vault. I pole vaulted once. That's how I ended up pregnant. The form was excellent and I cleared the pole. Gold Medal.

Floor exercise. Baby got moves. I can cartwheel, whip my ass around and gyrate like Beyonce but doing the splits could be a problem. I split my pants once at the Honky Tonk. I am pretty sure I did a Mary Lou Retton and twirled around on my back trying to get off the dance floor. Silver medal.

Synchronized swimming. This can be a beautiful sport. Although the swim caps aren't very appealing. I am not all about looking like Uncle Fester from the Munsters. But, I can stand on my hands, kick my feet and twirl around but then I would fall over frontwards get water up my nose and then have to blow snot rockets to get it out. I hate that burning sensation when chlorine infests your nasal passages. Nice try come back again in 2014.

The Shotput. You can make so many friends at this event. I once put down so many shots I met Ralph on a curb. I don't know what my hurling distance was but I am sure that tequila isn't my party drink of choice in the Olympic village. Bronze medal.

So you see. I am one with the Olympics and to prove it, here's a photo of me in my Olympic attire. 

(totally blitzed)

Let the Games begin!

Monday, July 23, 2012

The Mice Will Play

Vacation.. the definition results in relaxation. The people that make up my blog header minus the two worthless guard dogs took a little vacay with some of my kin folk. It was an adventure to say the least. Theme parks, go carts, rain and enough food to the point that I am pretty sure I could sustain life for a week on what I consumed in calories. Now more than ever I realize that diet and exercise should be apart of my world. I didn't eat jello but feel like it. Anyway, it was a short trip, and while I was away the mice will play. I had two great Hot Tamales which everyone showed the love. Thank you everyone for reading that series. I have had such a great response from it. I hope it continues to showcase our friends.

Now back to vacation. Why does it never seem like when you go on vacation, it is vacation? You have to travel, that takes up a day going and coming. Then you get there and  you have big plans to sleep in, relax, have a drink or two and it never fails its go, go, go. There was a time difference which didn't help and I got up every morning at the butt crack  mainly because the time change screwed me up and I shared a king size bed with the live birth control that slept in the middle of us. If you don't know what sleeping with a wild bear feels like, let me know I will send the kid over to sleep with you. At one point I woke up to him blankly staring into my face. I don't think heart attacks are on the to do list while on vacation. 

I mean really vacation is supposed to be fun, yet I am exhausted. And its meant to revive your spirits, refresh your body and rest your mind. My mind says your belly is beyond its extension limit, you need fresh underwear and my house needs cleaning from being gone only four days. Have you ever thought of what other cultures of people do on vacation? I mean what do Amish people do on vacation?  Do they take the horse and buggy to the beach? Snake handlers. Do they reserve hotels that allow pets? And Eskimos. Wouldn't you think that just hitting a local hot spot with a heater and some whiskey be sufficient? How would an Eskimo even shop for a bikini? "Excuse me Miss, you have anything with fur trim and polar bears on the top and bottoms?" 

Don't get me wrong. I love vacation. We usually don't take long vacations in the summer. I love to save my days at Christmas and start the new year refreshed. Again, a vacation in which I am tired from shopping, taking down the tree, going from place to place, more eating. See! Is it ever really vacation? I guess you just have to say that anything is better than setting at a desk and staring at a computer is vacation. So I will take it. And by the time you have read this, I have collapsed in the comfort of my own bed without the wilder-beast kicking me in the kidneys. 

What are your vacation plans? Anything spectacular...rest I hope.

Happy Monday!

Friday, July 20, 2012

Hot Tamale ..My Cliffnotes

I don't know if Tabitha from My Cliffnotes needs an introduction. All you have to do is visit her blog and see how hilariously fantastic she is. We bonded right away because I sent her a sappy email oozing with the biggest crock of shizl there ever was. All I can say, you ARE going to love her!

"It's gettin HOT in here, so take off all your clothes"
I am gettin so hot, I wanna take my clothes off!

Hidy-Ho there friends of The Gorgeous Dusty.
My name is Tabitha, nice to meet you!

Dusty and I share a love of Twat-waffles,
Bed Jumping
I may have made some of those up.

When I asked begged to be a Hot Tamale, I was banking on her sympathy.
 Color me happy when she said "You may"

Fun facts about me

My ex-girlfriend

My Hot-Tamale bod

Note: Real-fake heart tattoo with my initials

I get paid to flirt with pretty girls and drink beer!

I'm guilty of

Taking photos of strangers
and sending them to friends
What you don't?

Do you love me yet?

Seriously, see what I mean. I am also notorious for taking pictures of strangers. I once took a picture of a lady's bee hive at my son's baseball game. Bad I know, but hey a little naughty never hurt a soul. So go over and check her out. My god you won't regret it. I love you Tab!

See you all on Monday, I am off on a vacay for the weekend!
And if you want to be featured as a Hot Tamale, you know the drill, Holla!


Thursday, July 19, 2012

Hot Tamale ..A Girl On Film

Ok my sweets! It's Hot Tamale time. This sweet girl comes over from Girl on Film and she's a doll. She's just starting out in the crazy blog world but you know how I think its important to support our fellow bloggettes. Jessica gives these great movie reviews and after stalking her blog, she knows her shizl. She reviewed a few movies I actually forgot about and love. So make her feel welcome. 

Hey lovely people!

I’m so excited to be on Girls Love Fried Pickles! Dusty is like the cool big sister of blog land and I’m inspired by her honesty. She’s hilarious, right? I stumbled across her blog and my first thought was probably: What’s a fried pickle? And then: Why isn’t my blog this awesome? It took me ages to decide to email her because I didn’t think I would fit in with all the other Hot Tamales but she replied right away and here I am! Anyway here’s a bit about yours truly. Hi. This is me. Sorry that I’m not looking at the camera but it took me a very looonnnng time to find a vaguely attractive picture.

I’m Jessica and I blog over at Girl On Film where I ramble on about mainly movies and some other stuff as well. I like fashion, music, books and nail art. I dance ballet, bake cupcakes and I’m trying to teach myself the guitar. I’m 16 which means that unlike some of the lovely Hot Tamale peeps I don’t have a gorgeous husband or cute baby to tell you about. However, if you happen to be 16 and have one or both of these things, then good for you. (Depending on if it’s legal in your country or not, but whatever.) Anyway, I have my family of my mum and little sister. Here they are looking fabulous.

And hopefully very soon we are getting a new addition to the family – a little kitty cat! Any ideas for names? I love blogging and get so excited when I get emails saying I have comments or I log on and realise I got a new follower. I love feeling that I’m connecting with people. In my day to day life I’m kind of shy, normally the quietish one in any group so it can be hard to get to know the real me. However, getting a response to something I’ve written is the best feeling and has given my confidence a massive boost. And talking of people in my life, don’t let me forget my amazing friends. Here we are at our Prom a few weeks ago. I’m the (dyed) redhead, second from the right.

You’ve probably decided by now whether you want to read any more of my ramblings but if you still need to be convinced then I will give you an excellent reason to come and hang out at Girl On Film: you would get to spend time with a certified Prom Queen. Sadly I didn’t get a crown but I got the embarrassment of having to go on stage and trip over my own feet in front of my whole year group. Oh who am I kidding, I loved it! 

Here’s a cute picture of me with the munchkin. If you can resist that little face there must be a hole where a heart should be. I’m a shorty so she’s going to overtake me scarily soon and maybe then she’ll stop “borrowing” my clothes. 

If you follow me I also promise to make gorgeous cupcakes and ruin everyone’s diets by posting photos. (If you can resist these I need to know how. We could bottle it and make millions.)

I want to be a writer or journalist so I started my blog in order to get some practice and improve my writing skills as well as hopefully write for some other people. Which I can tick off the to-do list now, thanks to Dusty and a few other lovely bloggers.

I will leave you with a link to my most favourite post so far:

And my quote for today: Some succeed because they are destined to, but most succeed because they are determined to. I saw this somewhere on the internet and decided it needed to be shared with the world. Or the select few who are smart enough to be reading this fabulous blog.

So thank you for reading, if you made it this far and please come visit Girl On Film, read some movie reviews and enjoy! Have a lovely Thursday. Jessica xoxo

Fantastic right! So go over and give her some love, read and follow her or leave a comment below. 

Happy Thursday,


If you want to be featured as a hot tamale give me a shout or I may just ask you myself.

Tuesday, July 17, 2012

Fun Facts

My blog is coming up on a year old and there are a lot of firsts happening. I remember my first post and thought about it for such a long time. I didn't even introduce myself, I went in feet first with the silliness. But it just showed who I was. From that first post to my first official outfit post in which was funny because I didn't expect for that outfit to get chosen but in truth it is most like me. So for this first almost year, I thought I would give you the opportunity to get to know me a little better. I don't really write about personal facts because I am lets face it labeled the funny girl. So here are 5 fun facts and I would love to answer any questions you have. So leave me a question in the comment box and I will be sure to compile and answer all at once. I love getting know other bloggers and their lives. That's how we become friends really, and I have made so many wonderful twat waffles!

Fun Fact #1 - When I grew up I wanted to be a singer. Yep, I wanted to be up on stage, singing my heart out. But I wasn't brave enough to pursue it. It meant sacrificing my family and how my heart would probably miss being at home. I did make a few demos in my day and tried out once for a rock band as a back up singer. But it just wasn't meant to be. I sing but only in my car. Weird fact, I don't like to sing karokee. I have and with a few drinks would but I really don't like it.

Fun Fact #2 - I don't listen to music in my car on the way to work, but I do on the way home. I need silence and concentration while setting in traffic, plus it makes me nervous. I also get some of my best ideas for my blog in the mornings. 

Fun Fact #3 - I suffer from IBS. It sometimes causes havoc in my life. When I was in my twenties it was worse. I couldn't keep weight on, now it has the adverse affect. I am not overweight by society standards, but to me I am. I also don't always watch what I eat. I think about my grandfather who was diabetic. They told him not to eat ice cream or drink a beer. After major heart surgeries and living a long life into his 70's his motto was what doesn't kill you makes you stronger. So I sometimes indulge. But if I eat a lot of greasy things, I pay for it. 

Fun Fact #4 - I LOVE college football. Obnoxiously! I don't really care about the pro's. They are paid millions of dollars and live this high life and you only hope that they do good with what they earn. If you ask me $25 million dollars to throw a football is ridiculous. Our economy sucks but these guys get paid all this money for 3 hours of doing something they should love to do whether they get paid or not. That's why I love college ball. These guys are fighters and not even half of them make it to the pros. On any given Saturday starting this fall, I will be dressed in my Orange and White, screaming obscenities at the television. Note to all of you, do not knock on my door, it could be hazardous to your health.

Fun Fact #5 - I talk with my hands. If you tied my hands behind my back, I would probably turn to mush which for some could be heaven. I wave them around like a eagle taking flight. Get me mad and I look like an angry wasp. It's just my form of expression. Even when I talk on the phone and no one's around. I am using my hands and arms. And probably pretty comical and nobody can see me. It may have something to do with being a Scorpio. I am very animated and I don't back down. I would fight the jolly green giant, but I gotta use my hands.

So those are five fun facts. Now your turn. Ask me a fun fact, question or you can leave a comment. Anything goes, no rules remember and in my bloggy anniversary month coming up I will answer them every one. I also encourage others to do the same on their blogs. Let's get to know each other.

Let the games begin,

Monday, July 16, 2012

Equal Parts

This weekend while it was pouring down rain and I parked my butt in front of the TV, I was pondering. You know what happens when I do that. My mind goes crazy. I mean you can only watch so many episodes of Ghost Whisperer before you start thinking there's crap hidden in your closet. 

I got to thinking about man versus woman. Now before you start disagreeing this is my take on this. If you believe your are equal. Yahoo! But I don't believe that woman can do everything a man can do or should do. 

For instance, why would I want pee standing up? Further more why would I want a protruding one eyed wonder horse exiting my body? God gave me the ability to do squats. Which I should be doing 25 of by the way instead of writing this post. So what if I can't write in the snow. One up for the women.

Second, is it really a mans job to mow the grass? Females may disagree but I think so. I hate to even smell the fresh cut grass. I get snot bubbles and my eyes swell up. But there is something a man loves about mowing down weeds. It gives them empowerment to own a riding device with a blade. I think they could secretly have hidden serial killer instincts. My Duh sees a dandelion and puts the mower in high gear at speeds that only tractor trailer trucks should have just to mow over a weed with fuzzy things on the end. Then of course this killing device has to have its own home that I get to pay for and it stays there rent free just so the elements of the earth don't destroy it. Sometimes, I think if I didn't know who John Deere was, he was having an affair.

When you go out dancing the man is always the lead. I've done some country two steppin' in my day. And it would probably look pretty funny twirling around a guy in cowboy hat. I am pretty certain that I couldn't pick him up twirl him around and swing him through my legs successfully. But to a guy that's the greatest achievement. It's like a male cheerleader. Why wouldn't they try out for that rather than football? Football players get the shit knocked out of them and all for what? Seven measly points. A male cheerleader gets to put his hand up the girls butt, halfway to the crotch, watch their ass jiggle during the fight song and before the nights over a possible tit shot. As a woman, I don't want to put my hand on anything that I know excludes poop the size of tree logs or expels enough gas to cause a nuclear war. 

I like being a woman. If you ask me its the greatest thing since sliced bread. I don't have the great urge in the boiling heat to mow the grass if someone else is going to volunteer. I can say no to a cowboy who's stuffed his package so tight into his pants that there's a cowboy cha cha going on in his Wranglers on its own, and I would rather not stand behind a guy that can do a toe touch for one hour every Saturday during the fall season when I can watch some guy on the field in tight pants bend over with chips and dip in the comfort of my own living room. 

Believe me I am good with not being an equal in some parts of this great big world. 

Happy Monday,

Friday, July 13, 2012

Word Vomit

I have had so much fun this week because of all of you! I learned by you reading my blog you understand my personality, and my personal clothing style, the quirks of just being Dusty. And you keep coming back which I am grateful for. There are days where I want to come home, rip my clothes off like the Hulk, turn green and pound someone's face and then I read your comments and they make it all better. You guys are so worth it. So much so I use you like hookers on Broad Street as an excuse to not do my laundry, wash my dishes or eat. Which you need to keep it up because fluffy isn't responding to the no eating part. Maybe all the setting keeps it inflated to the maximum. I need to find the little plastic tube to let some air out of this butt one day.

But let me say this. I blog for you guys that's obvious, but I blog for myself. This is a little diary of sorts to my son. To show him one day how screwed up his mother really was but that even through the day to day posts, he knew I could be funny, pretty, really stupid, creative and just plain mom. But the one thing he will see is all of the great people I met along the way, who said wonderful things back. He will know that his mom stands for girl power and that we should lift each other up and help each other grow because we all deserve to have our words shared with others so that we inspire other women to connect and be real. 

This is really who I am. A pure whackadoodle. I tell it like it is, I am not good with sugarcoating things although I try, but what you read is what you get. I am not changing, I am not a clique girl and I would talk to a door knob if it answered me back. Hold on, let me see if that works........long pause....nope. I hope no one ever unfollows and don't worry I won't email you a picture of my middle finger if you do. I understand, some people just don't get it. That's ok, if you followed me, I followed you back and you haven't made one comment on my blog since then, I realize I increased your stats. As a thank you, send me a virtual high five will you? I impregnated your follower list with my face. I guess that's where its better to be seen not heard. I know its impossible to read and comment on everyone's blog, but eventually you get around to it. But I get the program and I too am ok with it. 

There are no rules on this blog, well if you insult my kid, then its on like donkey kong, but I want everyone to come over have fun, enjoy, share if you want and just give a big thank you to the friends you have made and be true to yourself and your blog. If your in it for shits and giggles with no intention of being anyone's friend, here's some toilet paper, you know that Scot kind that feels like tree bark when you wipe and could cause splinters to your private areas? 

Happy Friday y'all! I love ya!

Thursday, July 12, 2012

Hot Tamale ..An Organized Mess

This girl is a little spunky and alot of fun. We instantly struck up a conversation and have been bloggy friends ever since. Jade over at An Organized Mess. She's beautiful and send her congrats she just became a teacher. She also is a Razorback fan and I am a Vol fan, so I have made her pinky promise during football season we will be friends.
Here she is the wonderful Jade.

I can't quite remember how I stumbled upon Dusty's blog. All I remember was seeing the words 'Fried Pickles' and I immediately went right on over to her site and began following.

I'd like to say she had me at hello. It may be because I'm from the South and anything fried sounds appealing, but who doesn't love a good fried pickle? Yes, you may now refer to me as 'Snooki'. I'd like to think that she and I have a lot in common. I love wearing slippers, dressing up like Willy Wonka's Oompa Loompa's, and doing cartwheels right? 
I can't even do a cartwheel. 

Anywho, so let's get down to the nitty gritty and talk about something super awesome and completely fabulous:
I'd like to say that I'm quite normal, but I'd be lying. 
Let me show you just how 'not so normal' I am through a parade of photos...

 Do I really need to explain this? If you don't have the app 'I'd Cap That' then you're missing out on a lot of laughs. As if this caption isn't proof enough...
 This is me on a normal day. :/ Yikes.
 This is me attempting to be like my role model: Lindsay Lohan 
This is me just being completely awesome.

and this is a video of what my friends and I like to do in our spare time...
Here are a few random facts about me:
-- I'm 23 years YOUNG.
-- I'm caucasian with a mexican last name and african-american hair. 
As you probably noticed from my pictures above, my hair is supppperrrr curly/frizzy. About two years ago when the 'Brazilian Keratin Treatment' made it's first debut in Arkansas I tried it out and BAM! for the first time in my life I knew what it felt like to rock silky smooth hair. 
I felt like I was in a Herbal Essences commercial or something. I know that any girls with curly/frizzy locks out there can relate to my excitement for straight hair!
-- I love wine. Preferably boxed wine because {like I mentioned before} I'm super classy.
-- I'm a crazy cat lady. 
Meet my cute and cuddly kitties -- Ralph and Alice
-- My favorite candy of all-time is Hot Tamales. You know the little red, cinnamon candies? Coincidence that I'm now being featured on Dusty's blog as a 'Hot Tamale'? I think NOT! I suppose I've consumed so many Hot Tamales in my lifetime that I have now turned into one.
--As a child, I had an imaginary friend named Jimner. YES. That's right. Jimner. She {Yes, SHE NOT HE} was the most kick ass butt imaginary friend ever! We had tea parties and all kinds of cool stuff until one day she ran away. Don't worry. She came back during my college years and now she even has a Facebook account (told you she was a total bad ass). You can add her as a friend here.
People say that kids that have imaginary friends are extremely creative and completey awesome. Okay, Okay so maybe not the last part but these kids are said to be ridiculously creative.
 As you can tell just be reading this amazing little post here, this must be a fact because I'm quite the creative little creature.
Let's just sum up what you've learned here today:
I'm an awesome, creative, crazy cat lady who once had an imaginary friend that then turned into a FB friend,  and lover of anything pickled. I'm basically just whole lot of awesomeness rolled into one human being.
Take it or leave it, people.
So there you have little Miss Sunshine! Go over and see her and spread the love like jelly!
Oh, you can totally say you love her here too. I mean see above, I am sure she will be back to stalk me.
Happy Hot Tamale Day and don't forget if you wanna be a Hot Tamale give me a shout or I may just ask you anyway.

Wednesday, July 11, 2012

Reader's Choice

So I think I made a deal with the devil(s). She devils. I got myself into a pickles (pun intended). I agreed to do an official outfit post if one of those devils agreed to do her first ever guest post. The other one notice its plural has just been riding my fluffy about it. So I thought what better way than to get the whole kit and kaboodle involved than to have my followers choose which outfit they want me to recreate. As I type this, I am watching my worthless guard dog #2, Libby chase and try to eat flies. And away we go.

Number 1
Love this look and I have those shoes

Number 2
Casual and a cool fedora 
I love hats remember?

Number 3
A little Rock & Roll

Number 4

Those are the four choices you have. Of course, I can't recreate everything exactly. If that was possible I would be rich like these bunnies and have their amazing assests. But the majority will rule. God don't you like being in control? I hate it that you are, but its going to be fun. I will debut the look August 8th. That gives me enough time to try and work up the courage to do this. 

Okay, phone lines are open. Ha! Gotcha! Comments and suggestions are all yours! Go! 

Happy Wednesday,

Tuesday, July 10, 2012

Games We Play

Do you remember as kids you used to do really stupid games like truth or dare, spin the bottle, chicken fights, Simon Says or maybe even something even more stupid like going down a gigantic hill in roller skates with no stopper. Well, maybe you all didn't do that but I did and the end was tragic. 

I have really never gotten why these games are either so much fun or utterly stupid. I am not a dare devil at all. I once took a 5 minute helicopter ride in which I made out a will before getting inside. I like things very calm, low key. I live outside my box but I don't take risks, but it's fun to see other people do it. By fun I mean really stupid.

I have over 300 friends on Facebook. Do you really think if I dared them all to stand on their heads and fart the Star Spangled Banner they would? Probably not unless intoxicated.

If someone asked me to jump off a cliff into the bluest and most beautiful water in the world I would say you first dumbass.

If the guy with ugly teeth and body odor spun the bottle and it landed on me, sorry Charlie but get some veneers and Scope. I don't like rules.

And those chicken fights. You know the ones where you get on someone's shoulders and see who wins by knocking them in the water. We all know that's just a guys ploy to see if your top will come off when you get pushed over into the water. Pigs!

Simons says stand on one foot, touch your nose with your first finger and yell to the world I love eating toe jam. Dusty says I'm too lazy, get me Mt. Dew and I'll eat some Doritos.

Truth is, I love being who I am. I don't need to be someone else, or do anything to impress another person in this world. I already know I won't probably be on my son's school phone tree. I am not going to be a PTA parent. I don't think I classify as a cool chick and I defiantly am not into abiding by what every day society tells me. But I do have logic and morals and that's how I live. So Mother May I be happy with who I am! The answer is yes. 

I dare you to just love yourself. Simons says you can.

Happy Tuesday,

Monday, July 9, 2012

Catch a Wave

This weekend it was a snore. I mean the most excitement I had was getting dressed for a Saturday morning outing and taking my kid to the local grocery store to the CoinStar to cash in his change. He ended up with $12 smacks by the way. Any hoot, Friday night I was on Pinterest and came across a tutorial on how to get beachy waves. If you remember a few posts ago I spent a weekend looking up tutorials to perform this task. So I see this from one of  the girls I follow. 

Her hair is fantabulous. So what did I do, watched the tutorial which honestly isn't my favorite thing to do, but necessary in my quest for Hollywood hair.  So Saturday morning, I got got up showered which is pretty much not on my agenda because I like being a lazy ass when we aren't going out, but I had to get out of the house on an errand so I decided this was the day. The day I was going to accomplish this shit do or die. And here are the results.

Now I have made beachy waves before with a barrel curling iron but I have always used the  clamp to secure it. With these you just wrap the hair around the curling iron and let set for about 15 to 20 seconds and wa-la! I did spray my hair with a heat protectant but this turned out amazing which prompted me to buy extra hair products at the grocery. I also only burnt  my thumb once. I didn't use exactly what she use used and I did spray my locks with hair spray. It seriously held up all day and night. She also talks about making this style last for five days. Now, I don't know about you but after about 2 days I feel like I have fleas and have to wash my hair. But I will say that when I got up Sunday it still had curl to it, I took a pick and combed it out and it still had a pretty wave to it. So click here for the shizl.

I know this is really a stupid post. It's amazing how the littlest things excite me, but I wanted to share. Actually I just wanted you to see me in my sunnies. I look like I should be in the movie "The Fly" or a cop on a motorcycle chasing down a speed demon to give them a ticket. 

Happy Monday,