Ambulance Chaser

To say I suck is an understatement. I didn't have a blog post yesterday. Why? Because my weekend was jam pack full of nothing. The only thing exciting was the kids baseball game in which they came back from a 12 to 6 deficit to win. I feel so honored that the coach asked me to keep the scoring books but I think it was only to keep me quiet during the games. Total fail! Jokes on him. He obviously doesn't know that I am a multi-tasker. Most obnoxious team mothers are. Other than that, I took the pictures for my first ever outfit post. You will have to wait for that on Wednesday. I watched a lot of TV on Sunday. Matter of fact that's all I did. I exhausted all my efforts on Saturday, so I felt like a worm eating a dirt sandwich. 

While on my TV I got lazy butt marathon, I kept seeing this commercial about trans vaginal mesh. Some lawyer is advertising that if you have had complications from a botched trans vaginal mesh surgery to call him, that you may qualify for compensation. Huh? First off, I don't even know what it is, but its sounds funny to say. What does it do? Catch crotch critters? Maybe it is a protectant. The vagina's own soccer goal and there's a little goalie down there trying to block pieces of straggly toilet paper or fuzz balls. This will not work if you go commando.

Maybe its a barrier to the male species that he is entering the no dong zone. Maybe this surgery involves spider man and he shoots a web to hold all the body parts up. That's kind of creepy. Spider man with his mask hookin' up the wassa. Holla!

Side affects include painful intercourse and incontinence. What is that? It's funny spell check wanted to change it to ignorance. So your vagina suffers from ignorance and it needs a heavy duty band aid. I know a few times in my life my vagina has suffered from ignorance. I think that's where the phrase "everybody looks good when they are drunk" comes from. 

I wonder if the ambulance chaser slash lawyer asks for proof of your trans vaginal mesh? Perv. But hey, cash is cash. Might be an alternative to giving blood if your low on dough. 

Do you see where I am going with this? I have lost my mind. Crazy. Once again I have bestowed upon you my useless knowledge but in this case I can't even give you a clue as to what it is. All I can think is maybe its one of those things like you hit in badminton. Ooooh, damn I am good..a new Olympic sport. I think the only way you will win is if you play doubles. 

Happy Tuesday, 

I am going to research poop shooting now, 

Dusty