Two Cents Thursdays

It’s Two Cents Thursday. It’s my day to say whatever has been on my mind for the last seven days. Of course most people that know me, know I speak my mind, so please my friends who read this do not crucify me just yet. I know that she has followers and people that idolize her (Let me point out, I like her but I don’t idolize her). OK, here goes… The Rachel Zoe project on Bravo TV.

I could not sleep on Tuesday night. I do this sometimes. So after flipping through the channels, I came upon the Rachel Zoe Project, which I have watched before, but not in a while. Apparently, a long while there are some new people on staff. Anyway, my love of reality TV emotion kicks in and says what the heck. I mean I will totally confess I watched the Newlyweds on MTV, and was pissed when they broke up because then she started dressing ugly and I didn’t have a show to go see cute outfits anymore, but that’s ok, I like his new wifey’s style better..(huh, oh yeah, sidetracked). So I begin to watch and the more I watched the more I thought to myself, is she really like this? Does she really talk like this? Does she really dress like this? Is her husband really wearing a scarf wrapped 8 times around his neck? Has she always been like this, who can verify that she has used these words since kindergarten? Did she walk in class and say “oh, my gawd, those Velcro snoopy shoes are ba-nan-as! Is that shirt from Gymboree because its maj!”  I would like it verified that her first words were, Channel. Being from the South I thought that we had our own language but it's like her own little world. Her assistant I found very very funny. Aside from his nose being brown from kissing her wazoo, he really is the highlight of the show. On this episode she was getting ready to have her baby and her team of stylists came in with her list of outfits for the hospital, fancy luggage and hair and makeup team for when she left the building. Seriously, I packed sweat pants, Uggs, no makeup, granny panties, maxi pads in a duffle bag when I went to have my son.I mean lets face it, when your vajay jay is swollen up like the twelfth planet of the solar system, fashion is the last thing on your mind. Her husband bought her a 10 carat ring (I think) as a push present. I got a balloon and flowers which were wonderful and a Big Mac on the way home because I was starving. She eats an apple and has a pooch. My point of this story is, I love slang. I live in the South were your brothers are called Bubba, a hose pipe is a garden hose up North, fun is a tractor ride to the CO-OP on a Saturday, fried chicken is served at breakfast, a sale at Macy’s is ba-nan-as, your mom still gets her hair frosted threw a cap, a Toni home perm is still a fashion statement and something that is “maj” in our world means you have a serious condition you can get rid of with medication. I have my own slang, I say, “faboo” a lot and “love love” but the way they spoke drove me nuts. I am sure if I were to meet her she would go back and say, “Oh-my-gawd! That girl with the Gap jeans, cheap target sweater, boots from hmmm, (Joey the assistant will look it up), TJ Maxx handbag and nude lips, has this  K-ra-zy accent, owns nothing Louis Vuitton, proud to be a Southern Princess and loves fried pickles….

XO, D