Tuesday, July 24, 2012

Olympic Schmpics

"The new phone books are here!" Does anyone remember what movie that line was from? Oh and without totally looking it up. I watched it a 1000 times. My brother used to watch the movie Hot Dog. I think it was the start of his puberty years. Anyway, this Friday the Olympics are back and I can't wait. You have heard me talk about how my son's first name came from an Olympic gold medalist. I love, love the Olympics! I could have won a medal in several events, let me explain.

The pole vault. I pole vaulted once. That's how I ended up pregnant. The form was excellent and I cleared the pole. Gold Medal.

Floor exercise. Baby got moves. I can cartwheel, whip my ass around and gyrate like Beyonce but doing the splits could be a problem. I split my pants once at the Honky Tonk. I am pretty sure I did a Mary Lou Retton and twirled around on my back trying to get off the dance floor. Silver medal.

Synchronized swimming. This can be a beautiful sport. Although the swim caps aren't very appealing. I am not all about looking like Uncle Fester from the Munsters. But, I can stand on my hands, kick my feet and twirl around but then I would fall over frontwards get water up my nose and then have to blow snot rockets to get it out. I hate that burning sensation when chlorine infests your nasal passages. Nice try come back again in 2014.

The Shotput. You can make so many friends at this event. I once put down so many shots I met Ralph on a curb. I don't know what my hurling distance was but I am sure that tequila isn't my party drink of choice in the Olympic village. Bronze medal.

So you see. I am one with the Olympics and to prove it, here's a photo of me in my Olympic attire. 

(totally blitzed)

Let the Games begin!
Dusty



23 comments:

  1. This was so funny!! "pole vault" = hilariousness!!!
    I am excited for the olympics too!!

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  2. HAHA I'm seriously falling out of my chair over here about your pole vaulting antics. What would I do without my morning Dusty giggle? Ahh, this is my happy place :) Also, that photo is pretty awesome, you've got bug eyes! Sweet!

    xo Kayla

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  3. ridiculous.

    hilarious.

    the pole vaulting got me. GOT ME. hysterical.

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  4. Love this, so funny! I wish I had some of your enthusiasm about the Olympics, all I keep thinking is that it's going to take me longer to get to work, the underground is going to be packed and town is going to be so busy with all the thousands of people coming to watch.
    My friend is swimming in the Paralympics though so I will definitely be watching that and shouting at my tv and I may even watch the Olympic torch go past my house tomorrow ;)

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  5. AGREED! love a dub the Olympic games.

    "snot rockets" hahahahaa. exactly why I refuse to put my head under water.

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  6. Haha, hilarious on the pole vaulting. Congrats on your gold medal! I can't wait for the Olympics too!

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  7. Haha! You look like a real Olympic athlete! I want to see you do the synchronized swimming!

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  8. Why can't I think of that movie?!?!? That is going to drive me nuts. I know I've seen it. Geez.

    I love the Olympics too!! Seriously can't wait. It will be on 24/7 in our house.

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  9. Once again, you have the best post of the day! I love the olympics :)

    Kara
    ShawnKaraAndHeidi.blogspot.com

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  10. Thank you for making me laugh out loud. Now get back to work and WIN ME SOME DAMN MEDALS!

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  11. Laughed out loud like a total weirdo at my desk. I can't contain my love for the olympics. My life is about to get weird for the next 2 weeks.

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  12. wait...synchronized swimming is in the olympics??!?! I watched some trials so I've watched my quota...unless its synchronized swimming!

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  13. HAHAHA, "I pole vaulted once. That's how I ended up pregnant." Omg, I almost just died laughing at this. Did you know that I can't do a cartwheel. I know, I'm so embarrassed of myself.

    xo, Yi-chia
    Always Maylee

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  14. Oh pole vaulting...how I loath your child-bearing side effects! Ha oh gosh girl! You never cease to entertain. And yes, I do have that same Olympic hat. And yes, I wore it all around downtown SLC when they were in town. Ahhh...the Olympics! I can hardly wait!!

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  15. Oh my god. You're hilarious. Following.

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  16. I love that pic, hilarious. I also love the opening ceremonies of the Olympics, cant wait for Friday.

    Tab

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  17. This was so funny, and I actually was a pole vaulter so I find it particularly hilarious ;)

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  18. Apparently I'm pole vaulting wrong!

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  19. Holy hell, Dusty this picture is the BEST!! I won a gold medal in pole vaulting too...but I think I was a year behind you! And oh, I am pretty good at shotput as well...I have several medals for that event! Bring on the Olympics!!
    Shanna

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  20. omg, you are too funny. Fabulous post, love! If you get a sec, I'd love to hear your thoughts on my latest trend report & post for LaurenConrad.com. xo

    www.fashboulevard.blogspot.com

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  21. If I competed in the shotput I would be hurling too!

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  22. Pole vaulting... shotput... oh Dusty, I never would have guessed you were do talented! You and I should do some shot putting together some time.

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  23. Puh-leeze...give me a hard one...only one of the BEST movies EVAH. Sadly, my husband, from Ireland, who missed out on that movie as well as all of the OTHER movies from my childhood, thinks they're all pretty much shite. What does he know? I just came across your blog through the rabbit hole the other day, and thank GOD I did. I'm pretty sure we're supposed to be BFFs.

    Love,
    Navin R. Johnson

    aka,
    Shannan

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