Monday, October 15, 2012

The Skinny Big Side of Things

Good weekend? I can give mine the mediocre status. I wanted to share some thoughts with you and this is strictly my opinion and my brain cells wasted, but feel free to let me know how you feel at the end of this. Last week while blog hopping, I came across a blog that I do not normally read and to be truthful I can't remember the name of it, but it was a fashion blog and on that day she talked about finally finding a dress she had been searching for in a size 2. I immediately stopped reading, skimmed to the bottom and almost comment but clicked out. Now here's where my thoughts come in. Does it detour you that someone identifies their size on a blog?

Here's my truth. I didn't find it offensive but I found it detouring. I by health standards am not overweight. By my standards I feel like I am. I have been thin all my life, but I also had a baby at 34. The last 10 pounds have been the hardest and I fluctuate  But at my skinniest I never identified my size to people, well unless Duh was buying a hot pair of jeans and then I made sure I told him, but even then depending on the brand and what type they were it's always hit or miss because of my shape. (insert semi large fluffy). I remember after having my son and joining Weight Watchers. I went to my first meeting and these women looked at me like I was crazy. After about 3 meetings, I stopped going. What they didn't realize is in MY head, I have the same struggle as a plus size person, not by society standards by mine. 

I can say that my size ranges anywhere from this to this depending on an item. But I remember one time someone saying that Oprah was a size 8. I thought, oh yeah sure and I am the tooth fairy. But in European countries sizes are different and then they resonate to the US and if you can afford to buy $300 jeans to say your a size 4 when your really a size 8 then go for it. The problem I have is that society puts the pressure on a woman to be labeled with a number. I feel that pressure, not by numbers but by weight. I wouldn't care if I weighed what I did if I could get rid of the wiggle jiggle, but like someone who is larger I struggle, maybe not quiet the same, but in my head I promise I think the same things..I feel like I have thunder thighs, my butt is a ham-hock, I have the extra waving arm skin..etc...So seeing someone identify they looked high and low for a size 2 dress, maybe out of insecurity, maybe out of jealousy, maybe just being a bitch, but I probably won't read her blog again. I know not fair right? I look at fashion blogs with different size people every day, but they don't label that new jacked from JCrew with a website to click at the bottom that says click here for size 4.

I know its just life. I know that if I got off my ass I would be healthier and lose the busted can of biscuits look in my mid section, but I also have a life, its my own demon. But why can't we just say, "I was looking for this dress for so long and finally found it." High five yourself.

So what do you think? Would it detour you even if your skinny or plus size, to see someone identify their size on their blog?

Happy Monday,
Dusty

33 comments:

  1. I think that naturally thin people have a hard time relating to the struggle of being a regular sized person who has ups & downs with weight. I'm not fat by any means, but I always feel like I can lose 10 lbs. It does sometimes make me feel ick if someone is constantly blabbing about how skinny they are...or how rich they are for that matter.

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  2. I am with you on this chicaroo. I don't wanna know what your size is.. Numbero Uno because it all depends on the designer or non-designer brand you are wearing! Size is a silly thing.

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  3. I wear a different size in every single brand of clothing, so I don't even know if I have a "size". And it's not something I would ever put on my blog. Some things are just private, you know?

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  4. I completely get it lady!! I hate sizes, and wish that society had started measuring things in a different way a long time ago. (what im not sure of, just wish it had happened)

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  5. I almost wish one size would fit across the board, I've got the problem that I'm a different size in every brand! In some ways it's nice to not be a specific number or size (S,M,L, etc.) but I really don't like shopping, I love to shop online, and sometimes that is difficult to do with brands I'm not familiar with. Same goes for these clown feet I've got- sometimes they're size gigantic, other times, they're just large...LOL

    I don't think including your size on fashion posts is necessary- is that what fashion is all about? How thin you are? No, I don't think so. I think it should be about how good you make the clothes look, and how good you feel in them. But then again, I'm no fashion blogger-

    Sizes are silly- don't beat yourself up! I think you're beautiful, and if you don't feel that way than start working out more or eating healthier. Every time I work out, I feel like I accomplished something. Over a few weeks of going regularly I feel better- more fit, my clothes seem to fit better.

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  6. I absolutely identify with what you are saying about sizing, and numbers, and the impact it has on women. Weight is something I struggle with a lot, and even when I'm not struggling, it's still constantly on my mind. To make things even worse, sizes for sewing patterns are usually substantially smaller than off the rack, so I often find myself sewing a pattern that is 2-3 sizes larger, or labeled "X-Large" by the pattern manufacturer. So even if you feel good about your off the rack size, it seems like there's always some demon waiting to bite you in the behind.

    I feel torn about the size thing. I know that my best friend is teeny tiny, and has a really difficult time finding clothes that fit her. Maybe that's what this blogger was trying to get across? That not only larger women have trouble finding clothes in their size? At the same time, you're right... she very easily could have just left it at "sometimes, I have a hard time finding things that fit, and this was no exception." But she didn't. By the same token, I have listed my weight and my measurements on my blog before, to show my journey with weight. I'm not sure how different that is.

    Either way, Dusty, I hope you don't let this get you too down... I could tell you all about how some experts say that after 30, your body should hold onto a little more weight, but I don't think that matters. All that matters is that you can be okay with the way you look each day. Not numbers... on a scale, or in a closet.

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  7. I never look at someone by their size or weight. And I personally would not put my size on my blog, unless a reader asked me, then I would answer them privately. There are some bloggers out there who are all about being petite or plus size and finding clothes that fit them. That I don't have a problem with. I have a problem if you are just flaunting your size. That doesn't help anyone and just makes me annoyed. No one is ever good enough for society so you should just ignore all that junk. You are beautiful!

    xo, Yi-chia

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  8. What really pisses me off is when they are all, "I can't find the dress in size 2" and then they are all, "omg I'm so faaaat." and I'm standing there holding a brownie in one hand and 72 oz Dr. Pepper in the other. yes, Miss Size 2. You're huge. ugggh.
    bitches.

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  9. Today I can say no i wouldn't because of my struggle to be healthy, thin and fit I am finally in sizes I don't mind sharing. Before I lost my intial weight HELL no I would have been to scared.

    I was a larger person most of my life - at 5foot 5 I weighted 212 and my heaviest. I gradually (very slowly) lost 40 pounlds and then I was stuck. I then joined ww and saw great results!! Meetings didn't work for me but the food counting did!! I was at my goal weight for a long time - until I set a new goal weight and now I am a long way from that!
    So no it wouldn't.

    WOW a long explanation for my answer :)

    hehe
    Sharee'

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  10. I hear ya girlie! I think its great that the other blogger is a size 2 but honestly i dont want to hear it. Is it because i'm sitting here all fat and stuff? Um, why yes it is! Like someone else mentioned, if your blog is based on your weight loss journey then, ok maybe but i think sizes being said arent necessary.I'm just trying to decide if i was a 2, would i would flaunt it on my blog. Nah, i dont think so.

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  11. OMGoodness...I could go on for days about social distortion of the female body. It's so messed up. I've stated on my blog how much I've lost, but that's based on the fact that I'm trying to get healthy and I want to inspire people. I could sit here and whine about the five lbs I've gained since being back from Spain (as I shove a KitKat down my throat), but whatever. You are 100% right...it's all in our heads. Unfortunately, society is the main culprit for putting it there. And I don't know a single woman who doesn't struggle with body image at one time or another. Men suck...because clearly it's all their fault. ;)

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  12. There is a huge niche of "Petite" bloggers that seriously identify themselves by their petiteness...I could probably rattle off 10, and there are hundreds more, and all constantly remind us how adorably short/lightweight/tiny they are...ALWAYS listing sizes of clothing. From what I can gather, that community considers shopping a challenge, and use the sizes to help each other find clothes that fit their tiny frame.

    Rough life, I say. Oh, the injustice of being petite and skinny!

    Excuse me while I go eat a piece of cheesecake for lunch.

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  13. Oh poor me I'm so small! Sorry, had to get that out of the way.

    My pant size range is ridiculous right now so I couldn't identify with a size if I wanted to. All I know is that I reach a certain point where the pants are super snug (right about now I'm worried someone will see my ass burst out of these slacks by the end of the day) and that is when I need to take action. And I am a tall person and considered slender even though I am quite jiggly.

    We are all in this together, us big booty hoes.

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  14. Sizes are all over the place, and inconsistent. I don't think I've come across a blogger who mentions their size... But if I did I'd probably wonder why they couldn't just say 'oh I finally found ____ in my size'. That just seems like what most people would say anyways.

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  15. I can wear like 4-6 different sizes...and would never say what they are...it's nobody's business and nobody really cares. Maybe she is insecure about something like her nose being too big or her chest being too small, so she over compensates by telling people she is a size 2. We all fight the physical appearance demons...it sucks being a woman! But I sure as hell wouldn't want to be a MAN! love ya!

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  16. Yeah that would turn me off too...it almost seems like she is bragging about being so small and not being able to find the dress in her size. The only size I share on my blog is my height (or lack thereof!!!!!!!!)

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  17. Umm if I were a size 2 I'd be dead! Swear! And if never own my jean size! When I worked retail I made a point to never assume someone's size cuz I always got it wrong! Girls would be offended when I'd bring the correct size off the bat, they'd say "oh I'm a 6" when they were really a "10" ok honey try and fit.

    Do you cuz you're fab

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  18. When I see that crap, I have to stop myself from hate commenting. It's mostly because I'm jealous. But it is partially because it feels like they are bragging. I do not care if you are a size 2. I have eyes and can see that you are super skinny. You don't have to rub it in by writing out your size.

    I read a post once where the blogger actually wrote that she had weighed herself for the first time in years and weighed the same thing she did in high school. Was that necessary to share? NO! I was pissed. Those kinds of things need to be kept to yourself.

    It really bothers me more than it probably should. But after losing my thyroid and dealing with all that crap, people bragging about their weight really bothers me. Must be nice to be someone with no lives, hardly any real problems, who are completely healthy to be nice and skinny.

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  19. It doesn't deter me necessarily, but I get annoyed when people like to identify themselves by their size. It goes for curvy girls, and skinny girls. It drives me crazy when people are judgmental based on sizes, which is usually why I don't ever say things like I couldn't find any XS wah wah wah! But I get really annoyed when people say that because I am small I am unhealthy, or that if I gain 5 pounds it doesnt matter, because I am smaller. I guess size is just all around sensitive.. there is a ramble for you!

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  20. You already know how I feel about this... And you already know that I think you're gorgeous either way and don't need to lose any weight. But... you also don't think I need to lose any weight. We all see ourselves differently. Too bad we can't just be comfortable with how we look.

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  21. Well first of all, don't nobody want a bone but a dog.

    I wrote a blog post not that long ago where I stated that I went online and saw that one in three Americans is overweight. Well today I read where that stat was wrong and it's more like 2 in 3 Americans that are either overweight or morbidly obese. That's a helluvalot of people. Still I work in an office with a whole boatload of overweight people. I'm willing to bet that more than two thirds of them are overweight taking into account BMI standards.

    I'm 6'1 and I weigh roughly 185 pounds and the last couple of physicals I've had my physician has made it a point to let me know that I could stand to lose a couple of L Bs. I've always been told that I looked thin or I was underweight. Of course, we live in a very visual society. So many people seem to be enamored with being thin. I love me, I'm okay with me. I like how I look. As long as we're healthy.........what's the big deal?!?



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  22. I would totally agree with you! I think it's natural to worry about one's appearance, and tbh it would probably stress me out if I saw someone talking about their size 2... I'd just be like, whoa, must go for a run now.

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  23. Yeah, I think I would...why would you write that? It's not like you would hear a size 22 mentioning their size on their blog... I am insecure enough without comparing myself to other people's sizing...

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  24. yea, there is so much insecurity when it comes to size which is why, i stopped caring about size! i honestly don't know what size i actually wear, because i found that from brand to brand, it differs so much. i have a general ballpark, but by no stretch to i panic or rejoice if i end up in something bigger/smaller than normal. i think more than anything, it's just a matter of being healthy. i know that sounds cliche, but it's really true. i eat healthier now than i did in college when i weighed less. i have to constantly remind myself of that.
    and don't get me wrong, it gets tough, just stay encouraged and stay healthy! also, when it comes to moms, i mean, you're populating the earth. that's kind of a big deal! :)

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  25. Funny you write this. I just read a blog where she was telling readers about how she had the opposite problem with her weight, that she had problems gaining weight, and then she acknowledged that she knew people say they wish they had that problem, then she went onto say that her health was in danger and she listed them. She never said what her weight or size was, but just that just because someone is thin doesn't mean they are healthy. I thought it was tastefully done. But the girl your talking about, seems like she was throwing it in your face that she was a size 2. I would never say what size I was on a blog, poor form!

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  26. I went to dinner this weekend with some friends and they brought a new friend a long, the guy kept talking about how he had to loose 3lbs. I was like wtf. From where? Just take a dump and you'd loose 3lbs you nut job. by health standards I need to loose like 15 lbs but I have a life and I like food, so there. People are insane.

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  27. Sizing is so ridiculous... My body over the past maybe four years has changed slightly up and down but never by that much (my hips and booty aren't going anywhere! :)) but here in the UK I find that between different shops I can be a variety of 3 or 4 different sizes on the top and bottom. I don't think size is really relevent. As long at the clothes fit and look great who cares about the size!

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  28. You must have gotten the good jeans I the family tree. I by nature am plump. I have a ghetto booty and shopping for pants is the worst experience of my life. I think that if fashion bloggers were to tell me that they were a size 2 I would just be jealous. That being said I wear 3 different sizes, and I am a firm believer with Stacy and Clinton, it's not the number that matters but the fit. So my above statement is simply an honest one. I would be jealous but I wouldn't stop reading.
    Xxxxxx

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  29. Oh Dusty... you know I love your blog so much. I basically hate skinny people.... Not really.. well, in a funny, haha, kind of way. I think I would be bothered by someone bragging about anything. I think talking about your small size is bragging. Talking about fancy expensive things you have bought... also bragging. Bragging is gross unless its to your sister, mom or best friend. Its okay to brag out loud to them. But to other people and on your blog, just save it. It causes detours for sure.

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  30. I've gained 30 lbs in the last year - no one has noticed but me. Weight is super subjective. I sometimes DO wonder what size bloggers are, if they look remotely close to my body type. The reason? I'm curious if that look could work for my jiggle wiggle.

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  31. oh, good god.
    a size 2??!! NEVER would i even WANT to be a size 2. (not that i have ever been a size 2)
    anyway, i, too am currently at my heaviest (minus the last month of pregnancy) i will call it - nursing school weight gain - i have no energy, motivation, or drive to lose weight since being totally ALL consumed in the rigors of becoming a nurse.
    i'm not happy about it - in the least.
    and i WILL lose it. eventually.
    yes, you ARE a healthy weight and you look great, and you are your own worst critic.
    i don't like fashion blogs.
    i'm even NOT reading a blog that started me out on this blogging journey- i can now see the immaturity and selfishness behind her words, and it's such a turn off.
    but i love yours!!!!

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  32. After having thought about this for a few minutes, I honestly don't think it would bother me if a blogger mentioned their clothes size on their blog. I have mentioned mine before, 12-14 in NZ (goodness knows what that translates to in the US!?) and it was certainly never in my mind to make other people feel fat/insecure/ugly as a result. The only reason I did mention it was as a frame of reference for what has happened to my body as a result of having chemotherapy and taking steroids.

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  33. I personally don't judge people no matter what size, but I do find it strange that this person had to stress the fact that she had to look for a size 2. Personally, I would just say I had to search high and low for my size...not throw out the size itself. So I guess it just depends on if she was trying to "brag" or be informative. Either way, don't let her blog dictate your feelings. Society is definitely effed up, so you just have to go off how you feel! I'm pretty petite, but I stress about the extra pounds that creep up every now and then. Like right now, I feel like my face looks puffy and chubby and it PISSES me off. I don't know if anyone else notices, nor do I care, because the point is that to me...it's uncomfortable. We all go through it!

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